“Make me more worthy”

Last Sunday, I played my violin accompanying a vocalist singing "Savior, Redeemer of My Soul."  It was a challenging part that demanded a bit of practice on my part.  As I practiced, often a phrase from the end of the piece ran through my mind,

"Make me more worthy of thy love,

And fit me for the life above."

 Over the past decade or so, the idea of worthiness has been something I have often thought of and often felt somewhat discouraged by. 

Was Christ's love conditional?  How could that be?  He loves all and expects us to do the same.  If that is true, then what does worthiness really mean? 

As I thought of the words of this song, I realized that I am not asked to be worthy on my own.  I am asking Christ to make me worthy.  I attain worthiness through relation with Christ.  Not by living a mistake-less life. 

In Isaiah 1:18, I have often heard, "though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool."

That truly is powerful.  The Atonement of Christ has the power to make our sins and mistakes as if they had never happened.  But what is often left out is so important.  In the first part of the verse, before those words, it reads, "Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord." 

In order to cleanse our sins; in order to become worthy, we must come to Christ and work together. To take advantage of the power of the Atonement, we are invited into relationship with Christ. 

In the Book of Mormon in Mormon 9:27, the end of the verse reads, "come unto the Lord with all your heart, and work out your own salvation with fear and trembling before him."

Though in our culture, we often acknowledge we don't want to come into relationships of fear, when we look at what fear means in Old Testament and Book of Mormon times, it means something more like reverence, awe, respect, and obedience.  So Mormon more likely is saying coming in relationship to God, with reverence, respect, and willing to obey. 

 I realized the song was inviting me to come to Christ as I am, willing to partake of His atonement, and by doing, I am preparing myself to be able to hold and take advantage of all the blessings of Heaven, of God. 

Worthiness is a process of me becoming the best version of myself.  It is not about a checklist of things that make me more deserving. 

It is not what I deserve.  It is what I am becoming.